Hey thar... :D It's me with another fanfic. I know I need to continue Downward Spiral, I know, I know... but after my PC crashed several times and I had to re-write everything several times, I had to leave it on its own for a while. And someday, I woke up with this idea in my head and had to write it down. It was supposed to be a one shot but well...

I'm three chapters ahead, so you won't have to wait too long for the next chapter - er, in case you like it.

It's PG-13 because I'm not sure yet whether I want to include scenes of violence or not. Or if I want to include sex or whatever else that needs to have a huge written R on its forehead.

There'll be a few bennoda-ish situations in this story but it's mostly braz.

Have fun reading and guessing who the 'he' is. Will be revealed in the next chapter ;)

And pleeeeeaaaase review or rate! <3

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Tears Of Yesterday

Chapter One: A vicious desire

Five ships coming from the west side, the other three approaching the enemy from the south... He couldn't stop to read his amazing plan over and over again. The strategically perfect plan to fight the enemy, a bunch of weak, brainless and credulous idiots. Even the bare thought let him grimace in disgust. None of his people should ever again have to deal with such vermin. So it was his responsibility to eliminate the enemy's folk. No matter what it takes...

He folded the parchment and put it back to the others. Old plans, maps, letters. This war went on and on, no end in sight until the last man would be dead. So far, they've put down every riot, defeated every fleet and conquered every part of the enemy's territory. To many of his people, this meant the end of the war, having achieved every bit of the plan. No doubt, they have been successful. In fact, the actual plan was to conquer everything and force the people to comply. But he didn't want to pull his soldiers back yet; only this last attack at the enemy, and he'd be content. There was an unpaid bill, a word unsaid, and he had to fulfill his wish in order to get on with his life.

Just as he pulled out the map of the Atlantic Ocean, he heard a noise coming from outside of his tent. A little boy's voice fighting against a sharply sounding woman, who pleaded him to stay away from the tent. But the boy was a rebel like his Dad, stubborn as him, and finally made it into the tent.

Smilingly, he turned around to face his ten-year-old son, his pride greater than his slender body, with his teddy-bear clenched to his chest. His son, Jake Christopher was his name, was a cute-looking little boy, dark brown eyes, a pretty pale skin color and small pink-ish lips. No one really took him serious; his cuteness was an obstacle to him. Only his father knew what kind of a person his son was, rebellious, intelligent and stubborn. If he wanted something, he'd get it. And it gave his father sleepless nights, for his son interrupting his plan to defeat the enemy.

Jake Christopher walked closer to him, a fire burning behind his childish facade. For a ten-year-old, he knew too much. The whole situation between his father's people and the enemy's folk; he understood too well what was going on. From the very day he had found out about his father's cruel plans, this fire started burning inside of him. A fire that grew whenever this pretentious warm smile appeared on his father's face. It made him hate him, hate his father for pretending to be a good man with an idea of peace inside his head. But this certain idea didn't match his son's one, not at all. Other than the rest of the people, Jake Christopher was able to look behind the facade of his father for he knew things that were strictly kept as secrets.

Though all the cruel and unfair methods his father had chosen to become the most powerful man of this nation, Jake Christopher still felt love for him. For the part of his father that was kept locked behind brick walls deep inside his father's heart.

“What gets you here, my precious boy?” His father's arms invited him into a hug which he reluctantly accepted. Silently, he took place in his father's lap where his eyes immediately located the map of the great ocean.

While tracing the violet line along the coast, not looking up even for a second, he spoke, “You already know what I think about your plans.”

It made his heart ache, hearing the contemptuous tone in his son's voice. His smile faded and he tried to say something but no words could reassure his son, at least not the words he'd want to say. Instead he changed the topic by softly touching the teddy-bear's ear that was almost ripped off of the teddy's head. “Won't you get it repaired by Auntie Melinda?”

The little boy shook his head and hugged the teddy tighter. “She tried to repair him once but instead she did the opposite; that's how he got his ear ripped off. It wasn't that bad before she tried to fix him.”

Although Aunt Melinda was a pretty loveable and kind person, always having the kids' well-being on her mind, she somehow was gruff towards Jake Christopher's toys. Behind his back, he'd noticed it, she even treated his son as she did the old teddy-bear.

Jake Christopher went on. “She... she took him away from me once and replaced him with another new teddy. I noticed it right away; it was so stiff and... and it had no red ribbon, and no smile on his face.” Tears appeared in his small bottomless eyes, revealing the emptiness behind them. “She said that it was time to forget about the past. And that... that the teddy w-would only remind m-me of it... and that these stupid bastards wouldn't deserve my love.” His tiny chest rose with the word “bastards” and a sudden anger rushed through his veins.

Again, his father didn't know what to say. Nothing to calm his son down. That was if he wanted to keep his plan. All he wanted to do to fight the enemy and win this war, was his son's biggest fear. And said was aware of his father's purposefulness to follow the plan to its end.

Not expecting his father to say anything, he leaned over the table to have a better view on the map. His eyes followed the ink lines, arrows pointing to a small hand-drawn ship hiding behind a small group of hills, close to the harbor. It didn't get to the little boy what was supposed to be so special about the ship when they've already invaded the whole country. “So... what's the reason why you want to carry on this war? You seem so eager about... killing.”

The last word barely made it through his son's lips though it sent chills down the older man's spine. Hearing it from his son's mouth made it sound like a crime. His attempts to save his son's future, this war he was leading, only for his son to be the king of this country one day. The last two years, all the brave men he had lost in this war; he used to believe it was a good thing. But apparently, all it was to his son was... was a crime.

“Daddy? Stop thinking about things you should already know,” his son said coolly, not looking up into his father's stunned face. “And please answer my damn question finally, I came here to talk you out of it.”

Shaking his thoughts out of his head, he thought hard about his answer, and then said, “It's just the last ship that's not under our control yet. That's why we need to attack it.”

With a look that made it obvious how less his son believed him, the little boy replied, “Liar. There's something about this ship. Why else would you have to attack the enemy's ship when the enemy is already under your power?” His anger made him look way older than just ten years old.

And with any other of his men, he'd yell back for he couldn't take criticism. This was his war, his country. He was the leader and no one was allowed to tell him what to do. But his son. He couldn't yell at his son; he knew in what pain he was, and he knew that it was all his fault. So he could at least be honest with him, instead of lying about the most important part of the mission.

“Son...,” he stopped to let out a heavy sigh. He had always dreaded the day on which he'd have to explain this to his son. But he didn't have to; after all, he was his father and he had to decide what his son should know and what not. “This is nothing a ten-year-old should know about. And you're better off not knowing a single detail. I don't want you to know.”

But he had raised his son to never take no for an answer, and with his next words, the education obviously paid off. “If the ship was really so worthless, why for god's sake do you want to kill the people on it – so badly? Who's so important to you? All the people you wanted to see dead have at least disappeared. There's no one else that I could come up with who you'd want to kill. So, tell me, who is it?”

What a fool he was to believe his son would easily give up. He let out another sigh, this time angrier. “You should keep yourself out of my business, alright? Do yourself a favor and stop worrying about it. It's a waste of time.”